Asparagus Heaven at Rectory Farm, Stanton St John, Oxfordshire

(Nowt to do with cream tea though they do serve them in the cafe)

If there's food involved in combination with any hint of involvement by the One True Church (that'll be the word Rectory in the title) you know you're in for a treat.  A few days ago, when global warming finally came to Oxfordshire, la famille countrycreamtea headed down to Stanton St John to check out Rectory Farm.  What a brilliant place.

This may not look like much to the uneducated, but it's one of the best places on earth.  There's something about that green shed that you know is going to deliver.

What a fantastic sandwich board advertisement hoarding.  Nice choice of pastel colours with a bit of bird poo to add to the authenticity of it all (mind you - what the term Artisan adds to the description of local bread beats me).

The Rectory Farm is a combination of four things that are brilliant for a family which loves food.

1 Great farm shop.

(apologies for the rubbish photo which doesn't do it justice - trust me - great nosh at not-the-usual-ridiculous-prices-cos-it's-organic-and-covered-in-mud-so-it-must-be-worth-£15.95-a-kilo)

2 Free kids entertainment

Great bouncy castle action for which you're not obliged to shell out an orange drinks voucher for six and a half minutes of bouncing.

3 Great Little Cafe

Fantastic tukka on offer here. Top cake action, nice brew, not at giveaway prices but when countrycreamtea junior is bouncing away in seventh heaven it's a good deal. Nice furniture too.

4 Pick your own Asparagus.

Quality.

Now - I'm fully aware that the adjective 'heaven' is somewhat over-(ab)used. So - for some people it's watching a sky-plussed episode of Jeremy Kyle eating KFC; for others it'll be reading the latest idiocies to come from the pen of Will Hutton on how to get the world out of the economic mess we're in while drinking a latte in one of those hideous coffee chains; for others it'll be blaming the Police for the riots; but for me, and for all right-thinking and right-eating people, it's here in Oxfordshire.......

......An English Asparagus bed in mid May.  Let's zoom in.

Look at that trio of amazing specimens - with that cheeky one on the right who'll be wad up for it in a few days time.  What a sight - in the same league as these three.

The end result was this.

£2.40 for these bad boys - about a pound in weight.  I intended to take a photo of them cooked and plated (steamed for about 4 minutes since you ask) with a bit of melted butter and pepper on top, but Mrs Countrycreamtea started on her way down the stairs as I was dishing them up so I thought I'd better smash a few before she got in there so I forgot. Sorry about that.   The most delicious asparagus I've ever had. (I had a glass of slightly passed its best Minervois Rose with it - I've had worse combinations).

I would walk through fire to get to this place.  Brilliant.  If you live within 86,000 miles of this place and you don't go there you're obviously both 1) someone who watches too much television, and 2) someone who thinks the best way out of the current economic disaster is to borrow more money to pay the interest on the humungous national debt we've already amassed because you voted Labour in 1997.